Catwoman

Non-actor Halle Berry jerks her way thru' this CGI filled cat fart that was shat on by viewers and critics alike. You already know the story, she's a superhero (who this time narrates from beyond the grave) and she dresses and acts like a pussy. Patience Phillips (Halle) is a put upon geek working for Sharon Stone's face-cream company. A company that is poisoning its customers with bad face-goo. Halle finds out and is killed by being blown out of a sewage pipe.

But, just before you can leap about in celebration, she's brought back to life by the power of Bast (the Egyptian cat-god) and becomes a vengeful, crap, badly animated computer sprite unworthy of inclusion in a PS1 game. The FX are overbearing and awful and they take up most of the running time so.... that's right, even kitty loving kids would find it a massive chore to watch for more than 10 seconds. Big budget, magic cats, more CGI and little else.

You may howl in pain, but I like bad, plotless, wastes of over-priced crud and there's few movies more expensively vacuous, over edited and embarassing as this. Watch and cringe as Halle cuts her own hair, kisses catnip and pretends to be a cat. The director should change his name to Pissoff and you, my feline friend can use the DVD case as a litter tray.